we're moving back to the UK!

Well, it's not been easy making this decision at all. Despite the fact that we now live in an ideal meditation retreat, everything I always wanted as a base for my activities, the fact is that it hasn't been working - it has taken quite some time just to accept this. I just haven't found my inspiration, despite the conditions and all the work that went into the move here. Yashobodhi, my partner, feels something similar. It is partly that I don't resonate with some of the ideology at ecoDharma, but that isn't the compelling reason. I do resonate with some of it, too. It is something I cannot explain - as though the land itself seems not to support my practice. I have done some good retreat here, but I have had to admit that it isn't working. Maybe this phase of my life has just come to an end. I have been pursuing land based dharma practice through homelessness, Buddhafield and my four years in Tipi Valley since the late 90s. Maybe it's just over.

So now, it feels like we're in transit!

What has happened on the other hand is that since Sangharakshita's letter last year calling for a more coherent approach to our Dharma teachings, I have felt increasingly drawn to work with Order members and others in the UK. Suddenly I have talks to give, retreats to lead, and new writing to complete. Living up a mountain in Spain now seems more of an obstacle than the ideal situation it was when we were moving here. This is very strange, but the more I think about it and talk to others, the more its truth is sinking in. We've got to do a big turn around and leave. It feels humiliating and exciting at the same time.

Moving to London seems like the biggest lifestyle contrast you could imagine, but there it is. You can be on retreat in London too (the anonymity of it all) and I hope we'll be able to take with us at least some of the life we've built up here in the Spanish wilderness. The main thing about London (apart from the fact that I love it) is that we'll have access to a very large section of the WBO and FWBO. So - a return to my FWBO roots! I started the West London FWBO in 1976, living temporarily in a squat and renting a basement in Fulham for £10 a week. Now we have an impressive building near Notting Hill and are attracting large numbers. In West London I will be able to meditate, write, see people and teach dharma. Yashobodhi will have more teaching opportunities and a place to write. This wasn't my idea three years ago, but now it seems an inspiring change.

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